LOCAL NEWS- Ending the debate on public equity

KUALA LUMPUR- Tun Musa Hitam stated yesterday that the public debate on equity should end.


He said that he believes that it will soon spin out of control, as he has watched seemingly innocent arguments spun into highly emotional situations. "And the emotions in racial terms need to be managed with care." he states.



Responding to his comments, both sides of the fence have agreed to stop making public statements on the matter.


Apparently they have found a new method to convey their feelings that is deemed safe to use in volatile Malaysia.


"We are going to have a dance-off."



Similar to breakdance showdowns in 80's movies, they are donning on headgear and wrist warmers to prepare for what is likely to be an entertaining event. The criticizers of the EPU (Economic Planning Unit) findings have already started rehearsing their moves.


"Even though most of us are in our 40's, we still can "trip to the beat", says one representative from this camp.




Among moves that they have "nailed" are;

-the G-Kick, a kick with the legs and the arms forming a G shape:
which will signify the question "why arent you releasing the EPU data yet?"


-the Insane Corkscrew, a spin with the direction constantly changing:
which will mean "youre not answering our questions directly!"


-the Helicopter/Coffeegrinder/Ball-and-chain - a rotation of the legs while the hands are on the floor:

this will just be for showing off purposes.



picture- why arent you releasing the EPU data yet?


When asked if he had anything to say to his opponents, the message was;

"ITS ON BIATCH!!!!!!!"


(We could not reach representatives of the other camp for comments. Rumors state that they are debating on whether it would be concurrent with government policy to "keep it real".)


as reported by Joe Lacks